Today was the most gorgeous day in San Francisco: the air was crisp and clear - glowing from the SF Giants' sweep of the World Series. It was a day to remember, a day to cherish. I stopped by that gay mecca, the Castro, where some people strolled shirtless, men hand-in-hand, delighting in God's gift of the marvelous day.
As I gazed upon The City from the upper reaches of its infamous gay mecca, I though back to "prophet" Lou Engle's descriptive words of its local demizens: "...those people who embrace the darkness." I hoped Engle was somewhere - anywhere - on the East Coast.
For it was not a beautiful day anywhere along the East Coast, not in New York, Washington, Atlantic City, Baltimore, or even Virginia Beach. That's right, not even Pat Robertson's Virginia Beach escaped the wrath of Frankenstorm's God. The almighty Pat Robertson who once boasted that he had prayed away a hurricane was powerless against Frankenstorm. Perhaps his encroaching senility had something to do with it.
San Francisco has always been an anomaly to the Christian Right: the bastion of sin with the best of taste, sophistication and ...compassion. It is unconquerable in its fight for human dignity and rights. Many have tried to scale its walls of liberalism and failed, simply because the only kind of people it cannot tolerate is the intolerant. And while it will give succor to the lowest of the low, it will not harbor the highest purveyors of righteous arrogance.
It fairly glows amidst contempt by the radical Christian Right.
Home to the only "Emperor of The United States", to washer-women-turned-society matrons, to drag queens, to political prostitutes, to architectural oddities and to porn shops, San Francisco is certainly a candidate for the ultimate disdainful sobriquet "demonspawn." It is a town of the devil and one which the Christian Right prays daily for two or three more shake-ups along the San Andreas (preferably more than 8.0 to be thorough).
Maybe God Has Changed His Mind
If anyone is tired of the incessant carping by the Christian Right about San Francisco's sinful status, it might just be ... God. After all, after Colorado Springs (the Vatican of the West in Christian Right Circles), Virginia Beach is the cornerstone of morality, with Pat Robertson and his CBN empire at its center. Why, Pat Robertson is on a one-on-one basis with God every day, it seems. But God may be tired of having His name used in vain: against people instead of for them, as a weapon against enemies as opposed to a support for friends and neighbors. He might be tired of the incessant invocation of His name to do harm to people (ala imprecatory prayer). He might look at wickedness in a completely different light these days and might consider a prosperity pulpit pimp not quite the worthy proponent of the kind of righteousness He envisioned.
Mark Twain once said "God made Man because He was disappointed in the monkey."
Maybe Frankenstorm is a demonstration of God's contempt for Pat Robertson and His admiration for those "people who embrace the darkness."
READER: You can stick this in your "and-I-thought-my-own-transit-system-was-bad" file.
MUNI: You can just stick it.
Dear Reader: There is only one reason to ever recommend San Francisco's municipal transit system (MUNI) to anyone: REVENGE.
Today marked the 11,121st time MUNI has tried to make my life miserable. It always succeeds. Over the period of 38 years, it has taken my superlative love for the City and brought it down not one, not two, but ten notches: each day I wonder at how many fantastic things and people the City has to offer, then I experience MUNI. It's particular form of sadism depresses me. To make matters worse, I live in Park Merced and I'm tethered to the M Metro line. Everybody at Park Merced and at San Francisco State University is tethered to the M if they want to go anywhere. It could be said that the M is the worst of the worst which it may very well be, considering the alternatives.*
If you live in Park Merced, it takes 90-120 minutes to get near the Embarcadero; longer if the system has an intended "slow down". "Fiction!" say the MUNI administrators. "Fact!" say the people who actually have to ride the thing.
90-120 minutes. If you have an important 9AM appointment, better get up before dawn.
There are more horror stories about MUNI than there are MUNI cars...or drivers, but since I've had to suffer through it all for 38 grueling years, I might have a greater number than the average person. I've gotten stuck in the tunnel so many times that I've considered setting up housekeeping inside of it. I've gotten stranded (along with other passengers) when the driver says "this is the end of the line for me, take the next bus." There seldom is a "next bus" for 30 minutes. I was stranded at Bayshore and Cortland at 1AM. No explanation, just "get off!" I've known a driver to purposely give wrong directions to a slightly tipsy man as a joke. I've had a driver allow me to board a bus after I've asked if it went to a certain destination, then, after he started up, laugh, and say "but in the opposite direction!" I've known of a bus station being "lost" by MUNI (put in storage during renovation of the stop, then never found). But the worst experience of all did not involve and bus, a driver or even a route:
Life overlooking the Bayview disrict's 3rd Street was a constant stream of shootings and ambulances, possibly because that particular stretch, and one particular corner saw the most homicides in the city - 7 homicides in 5 years. The funeral parlors never knew a recession.**
One morning, I looked out the front window and saw a bizarre sight: on the most homicidal corner in the City, workers for the new T-line were placing sets of green steel benches, forming a "conversation pit".
It wasn't a bus stop. Nor was it near a proposed T-line stop. I spied a policeman surveying the scene, gesturing to the workers.
I ran downstairs and across the street.
"Office, what's next? TV and a gun rack for the shooters?" He looked at me with agreement.
"I know what you mean. The idots. On the worst corner and not a bus stop. They have their orders, though and I can't do anything about it, but maybe you can."
??
Get on the phone to City Hall, The Mayor, any friends who have friends. Once they rivet those damn things into the pavement, they're permanent and there's nothing any of us could do about it."
I had visions of men with high-powered rifles kicking back between rounds as if in a shooting gallery, so I ran back to my apartment, made frantic calls and within an hour, the cop, the workers, the benches had vanished. I breathed a sigh of relief: the building had gone through jack-hammers (on Saturday mornings no less!) repeatedly correcting MUNI's damage to sewers and late-night tweakers having parties on the unfinished station platform (our building spanned a good portion of the block).
(Side note: my MUNI karma being what it is, I rode the maiden voyage T-line train downtown - all 400 passengers got stranded near the Cals-Trans station. MUNI's general manger gave an immediate press conference for mea culpas. BFD)
PURE SADISM
What MUNI has against the citizens of San Francisco is anyone's guess, but since absolutely no one on earth could possibly be that inept, that stupid, that clueless about public transportation, it's safe to say that the constant screw-ups are done for MUNI's amusement. And yes, I've seen station attendents laughing at the frustration of riders. I've seen workers lumbering around at a rate that would make a sloth look like Speedy Gonzales, giving disdainful glances to people. The last act of true civility I've witnessed was the thanks a driver gave to passengers when they alerted her that she was going in the wrong direction (MUNI had pushed her on to a new shuttle route without telling her exactly what that route was***).
And as everyone knows, making polite-but-critical remarks to MUNI is useless, simply because it positively revels in its sadism. MUNI is absolutely immune to criticism: only when outcries reach fever pitch does MUNI react, and usually with a costly promotional stunt like Clipper. Think of Clipper this way: a convenience for MUNI with only slightly easier access to a platform or buss stop where you'll wait for MUNI just as long. Using money for additional cars has never been a priority for MUNI.
As for rectifying the mess we call MUNI, well, many people have proposed scrapping it entirely and having the City purchase a fleet of donkeys. But then sadism comes through again: any MUNI driver would be reported to the SPCA.
*Sorry, the 28 (Baker Beach) and the 17 (tools around in circles in Park Merced or goes to West Portal by way of the North Pole) do not count - not if you need to get to civilization or BART. **But going to the funeral of a gang member was dangerous, since the gangs always tried to pick off a few relatives. ***This actually happened TWICE on the same shuttle route - the other driver was not as appreciative)
"If God doesn't destroy San Francisco, he should apologize to Sodom and Gomorrah" "OK, so it won't burn down in the traditional sense, but where is that earthquake when you need it???"
"It's an odd thing, but anyone who disappears is said to be seen in San Francisco. It must be a delightful city and possess all the attractions of the next world"
The first two quotes were from religion-based blogs. The third was from that classic reprobate, Oscar Wilde.
"Your city is remarkable not only for its beauty. It is also, of all the cities in the United States, the one whose name, the world over, conjures up the most visions and more than any other, incites one to dream. " - Georges Pompidou
Understatement has its purpose I suppose, but when it comes to certain topics, understatement always eludes me. So when I saw the musical Tales Of The City at San Francisco's American Conservatory Theater, I knew that understatement would be impossible: after all, I actually LIVED through all of it. I even topped Michael Mouse in some respects.[1]
It's not a great musical by Broadway standards, but what makes it superlative to San Franciscans is that it is as true as it is heartfelt: it tears down barriers and replaces them with freedom, love and understanding. It's San Francisco at its best.
Of course, it will be reviled, boycotted, demonized, and deemed absolutely criminal by all the Bryan Fischers, James Dobsons, Beverly LaHayes, Lou Engles, Herman Cains and Tony Perkinses of the country. And since the musical's premier is in San Francisco during Gay Pride month and before San Francisco's million-in-attendance Gay Pride celebration, those people will be working feverishly to revile, boycott, demonize and deem absolutely criminal the city of San Francisco itself.
Thankfully, every year the City has managed to rise above all the vitriol and deliver an astoundingly loud "FU!" to those who don't admire it for what it is: the country's most accepting and compassionate city. It rises above the vilification, above the overt attempts to "save" it. It rises above the hysterical preachers (Lou Engle has called gays in the Castro "Those people who embrace the darkness"). This year, however, might prove more difficult to be celebratory than in the past: the Christian Right is ramping up the vitriol with impunity. It realizes that an attack on San Francisco is a powerful punch against the current Obama administration, the MSM, Hollywood, and every single liberal on the planet. It will try desperately to counteract the reactions to the Gallup poll that discovered over 50% of Americans are in favor of same-sex marriage. It will revel in photos of the Pride parade showing "perverts" and it will ferventlyhope that last year's violence at the Pink Party will be repeated - in fact, escalate into chaos and even more bloodshed. [2]
Yes, that last statement was meant to alarm: the Christian Right is becoming more violent in its hate speech, comparing gays and lesbians to N*zis, linking them to pedophilia, incest and bestiality. Granted, they use archaic stereotypes and dismissed "research," but they are mobilizing the fringe as never before with videos, ads in newspapers, politicians and a string of radio hosts who use those same politicians brazenly to promote a neo-Reconstructionist agenda. And the fringe is reacting: hate crimesagainst the LGBT community are up. Violence is just around the corner: it just needs a verbal spark to set off one individual, one group.
"San Francisco has been wicked from the very beginning"
I stumbled upon an ironic video while googling "San Francisco Sodom and Gomorrah". It supposedly focuses on the firebombing of a church when anti-gay preacher Lou Sheldon was supposed to speak. Edited by an evangelical Christian, it sets out to tell people how absolutely horrible and sinful San Francisco and its gay community are. In the process, however, if you count the lies and distortions you come up with, you realize that the primary purpose was to make people totally fearful of homosexuals.[3] It reeks of "This could happen to you!" In addition, it features Scott "Pink Swastika" Lively, one of the architects of the "kill the gays bill" in Uganda. In their momentum focusing on gay political power, they forget the oppression gays had seen well into the 80s.
Perhaps this White Night Riots incident can put things into perspective:
The second stage of the violence was a police raid/riot hours later in the predominantly gay Castro neighborhood, which vandalized the Elephant Walk bar and injured many of its occupants.[34] After order was restored at City Hall, SFPD cars carrying dozens of officers headed into the Castro District.[35] Officers entered a gay bar called the Elephant Walk, despite their orders not to do so. They shouted "dirty cocksuckers" and "sick faggots", shattered the large plate glass windows of the bar, and attacked patrons. After fifteen minutes police withdrew from the bar and joined other officers who were indiscriminately attacking gays on the street. The incident lasted nearly two hours.[4]
I was there, at both City Hall, then later in the Castro. You haven't lived until you've seen 50 riot-helmeted cops marching toward you, shields touching each other to form a wall of plexi-glass armor ready to throw tear gas. It was sooo much fun!
"But the Christian Right didn't cause the riot!" Perhaps because, at the time, the big CR was not as powerful as it is today. Its rhetoric not only kills indiscriminately, it owns politicians: just look at some of the proposed draconian laws in Texas.
Besides linking the LGBT community to pedophilia, incest, Nazism, witchcraft and bestiality, it has now focused on the idea of "recruitment," especially in schools. It's really a non-issue, but Tony Perkins of the disingenuous Family Research Council has sounded the alarm of "recruitment" in schools if anti-bullying education is enacted.
Mr. Perkins will doubtless take umbrage with this passage from Tales of The City:
[In a letter written to his mother, Michael (Mouse) Tolliver telling her that he is homosexual].
No, Mama, I wasn't "recruited." No seasoned homosexual ever served as my mentor. But you know what? I wish someone had. I wish someone older than me and wiser than the people in Orlando had taken me aside and said, "You're all right, kid. You can grow up to be a doctor or a teacher just like anyone else. You're not crazy or sick or evil. You can succeed and be happy and find peace with friends - all kinds of friends - who don't give a damn who you go to bed with. Most of all, though, you can love and be loved, without hating yourself for it."[5]
So will the beautiful, wicked City-by-the-Bay be able to prevent possible extreme attacks? No. Nothing can prevent hate crimes perpetrated by zealots spurred on by the Religious Right. Zealots have, in fact, become the new home-grown terrorists, oblivious to the parallels their preachers have to radical Islam's imams. And will it survive the amped-up volume of rotten rhetoric? Yes. The performance of a show like Tales of the City is certainly a testament to that: San Francisco will survive because basic humanity, love and compassion will always survive, despite the efforts of some to make the very soul of The City extinct.
Alright, this piece may go down as just another rant, so as to end it with a more PC tone I will force myself to understatement: the attackers (he says with teeth gritted) against the glorious City of San Francisco are ... not … very…nice … people.
1Before the "Jockey Shorts Dance Contest" started, I was a go-go dancer in the infamous End Up's cage. I lasted more than three months. I was popular … as well as hungry. 2 I always seem to be close to crimes in The City: I was very near the Pink Saturday homicide (and I was in a Castro bar during the White Night Riots), so I was able to ask police about it: it was gang-related and had nothing to do with the gay community or the Pink Saturday Party. The Christian Right, however, omits this fact, hoping that their profile of gays as violent will be proved correct. 3FYI: Harry Hay did not intend to replace Judeo-Christian principles with his own ideologies. Furthermore, gay politics has never been as powerful as the video might leave you to believe. Gays have always been creative in their vociferousness, leading most to believe that they have enormous amounts of power. 4 Police also shouted "sieg heil!" and "bonzai!" When they herded us all onto the intersection of 18th and Castro they were astounded at the number of patrons in the bars - approx. 1500. When we started to shout "Go Home! Go Home!" the 50 policemen reasoned that the crowd was unsustainable and ... went home. One bartender at the Elephant Walk couldn't go home: after having scalding hot water poured over him, he was clubbed viciously enough to lay in a coma for over six months. 5 Interestingly enough, this is the same letter Maupin published in the San Francisco Chronicle, telling his own mother that he was homosexual.
Beer bust. Like today's Sunday at the Eagle Tavern in San Francisco, I experience my "infusion of humanity." That's because it has EVERYONE: young, old, fat, slim, swimmer's body, buff-up beefcake, levis, leather, punk. This mix is the most energizing piece of the earth that I know. Sniff, sniff, I'll be REALLY sad to see it go!
To some, the above words might be comforting, and yet, to others - a bit ominous. "Strategic partnerships" "key organizations" "impact those ...who do not attend our church."
Just to let everyone know that I'm trying to be as fair as possible concerning a certain church "premiering" here in my home town. It's a Southern Baptist church called "EPIC." Whether or not that is an acronym of sorts I'm not sure. It's certainly billing itself as the "cool" place to be on Sundays and has given itself a boost with a sort of "toys for tots" drive. The neighborhood in SF is unusual for a church - amongst the yuppies encased in glass condos and lofts, but hey, it's cool!
I'm reserving my final judgment until after I speak with it's pastor, Ben Pilgreen. I really need to find out:
1. Is EPIC going to adhere to the "doctrine" of the Southern Baptist Convention?
2. As a "planted" church, has it been funded by the SBC or an organization, like Arizona's Vision 360?
3. Will the church be at all political?
4. If it hopes to change anything about San Francisco, what will that be?
5. What is its attitude towards gays? Will they be allowed to attend worship services? If they are allowed, will they be looked upon as living a sinful lifestyle? Will they be pressured at all concerning their lifestyle?
6. If EPIC will accept gays, will it anticipate any condemnation from SBC?
I have called about four times and written three emails. No response. I have NOT given EPIC any cause for alarm from my questions.
Not A Human Interest Story, But A Wonderful Story Nonetheless
AN ENCHANTING LOOK BACK
For years, the Faeries of San Francisco have had a portal to their world and to ours. And being the San Francisco portal, it was, of course, considered the Grand Central Station for faeries.
The other day, however, the portal was discovered in a terrible state: it had obviously been dismantled (with the exception of the actual doorway itself) and a note was tacked on to it. It read, in effect, that Oberon, King of the Faeries had closed the portal, distributed its plants and flowers (as well as the sparkly gemstones the faeries used to play with) and declared it inoperable. Why the King did this is not important since the faeries knew him to be a very strict but just King and they never questioned his purposes. They knew that he would somehow provide an alternate portal.
But it was nonetheless a loss. Such gay times they had there! You see, to the faeries, our world is exciting, in a rough and rugged sort of way. Even a sleek apartment in the sky is filled with adventure and exploration. The portal was therefore seen as a place to ...party! It was the last party for some and the first party for others.
It transcended anything we could imagine. For instance, it had a toll taker who took away their gemstones because humans valued them so much and would start poaching faerie communities if they ever found so much as a tiny ruby. But faeries being very sloppy (as faeries are wont to be), they littered the portal and the toll taker had to eventually pick up all of them.
Party Time!The light is white,
so they're... ah ... you know!
When they came through the portal into our world, they became progressively bigger in size and could actually be seen by some humans! And when they went back, they shrunk back to King Oberon's ordered size which was smaller than the head of a pin.
In the evening, they gave off rainbows of light and when they made love, they produced the purest and brightest of white lights. That's the reason white lights lit up the portal on moonless nights, faeries being exhibitionists and all.
They would also be met by Fiona, Faerie of the West Wind who, on her magic flute produced music so entracing that faeries felt very welcomed (or very missed). The problem with Fiona's music was that it was never sufficient warning for faeries wandering up the path to the Dark Forest. Faeries going in ... but not coming out.
So it's the end of an era for San Francisco. The King is allowing the doorway to be overgrown with wildflowers and weeds. It may not be discovered for a very long time. But as the faerie legend goes, anyone who discovers the doorway is destined to plant the bright flowers and plants to entice the faeries back.
It's one hour into Christmas Eve and I don't know why I'm writing this except for the good feeling in telling anyone, everyone that someone out there is still trying to love you.
Trying?
I won't be a hypocrite even on Christmas Eve: I won't tell you how we all have the potential to love everyone. To hate everyone, yes. Hate is a man-made emotion so therefore man sets the limits on hate. Unfortunately, he hasn't set very many limits yet. Love, however, is something etched into in our souls. Love embraces humanity. But even though we are born with an endless amount of love for everyone, it is difficult to love anyone. Love itself does not have barriers, but encounters them every day: barriers to the way someone is supposed to look to us, to the way we are treated, to the way we are accepted. Skin, teeth, eyes, body shape, height, smell, clothes, environment, friends, employment, status all work to set up walls against unconditional love.
So we can only try our best to overcome these barriers. We can only try to love everyone. Maybe the attempt is enough.
Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
Mark Twain
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