Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Mrs. Mooseburger, Pt 1: Palin and the Christofascists

"...And the Blind Shall See!"
Don't bet on it!

But Maybe the Ear Can Hear? Don't bet on that either. The response from the Christian Right about John McCain's pick for VP has been so enthusiastic and so deafening, that some of the other points vetted about her seem to have faded into the distant ether. Sound-wise, here's what their reaction might be likened to:

From whispers to screams:

Did Sarah Palin support Senator Ted Stevens when he was indicted? ("sssshhh...yes")
Did Sarah Palin support the building of "The Bridge to Nowhere?" ("ssshhh...yes")
Does Sarah Palin have an unmarried pregnant teenage daughter? ("sssshhh...yes")
Is Sarah Palin against the war in Iraq? ("sssshhh...yes")
Was Sarah Palin part of a 527 group created by Ted Stevens for his campaign? ("sssshhh...yes")
Did John McCain call for the eradication of 527 groups? ("sssshhh...yes")
Did Sarah Palin say she didn't think global warming was man-made? ("sssshhh...yes")
Does Sarah Palin support the NRA as a lifetime member? "YES!!"
Is Sarah Palin against abortion? "YES!!"
Is Sarah Palin against same-sex marriage? "YES!!"
Is Sarah Palin a woman? "YES!!!"

And the way other people see it?

"This is the choice of [James] Dobson, [Pat] Robertson and [Rush] Limbaugh," said Sen. Chris Dodd, D-Conn., on CNN's Late Edition. "This is a real sop to the extreme conservative elements of the Republican Party."

April MacIntyre Aug 30, 2008, 15:53 GMT People:

Sarah Palin: God, guns and grit

McCain's decision to throw a bone to the Evangelicals with the selection of Palin has worked, so far the religious right, for whom the issues of abortion and gay rights supercede economics and education concerns, are seemingly happy with his decision.

And if the blind COULD see, well...

God's Ambulence Chasers: They must Be Sooo Disapppointed!

"Waddaya Mean These Aren't Playboys?"

In an article several years ago, I called Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell "God's Ambulance Chasers." You see, while sending over food and clothing to victims of the horrible Asian Tsunami, Jerry Falwell also sent 600,000 tracts of Christian/Bible literature. The Buddhists, Hindus and Muslims were (rightfully) insulted and said "thanks, but no thanks." ("And you can keep the Spam too!") And after Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans, Pat Robertson ordered 40,000 copies of Bibles to be distributed to Katrina's victims.

So, with the anticipation of Hurricane Gustav, you could almost see the glowing righteousness flowing through their veins!

How disappointed they must be that Gustav didn't do that much damage to sinful New Orleans! Can they stop Kinko's from printing up all of those "We Told You So!" fliers?

"Let'sTake shelter just in case Pat Robertson
decides to rain Bibles again!

Mrs. Moosberger, Pt. #3: Palin and Bullwinkle

The Citadel of Freedom
...To Kill Something Besides A Moose

The NRA finally has a real, honest-to-goodness Vice-Presidential Candidate on their hands. Cheney was just a mean guy who everyone knew had guns up the wazoo, but Sarah Palin can say "NRA" with sex and pizzaz! She's a WOMAN for crissakes! That's a bona fide candidate. And besides, she doesn't sit in some marsh waiting for a dumb bird to appear (and she doesn't shoot her huntin' partner in the face either), she hunts REAL animals! Ya know what I mean? Then she EATS THEM! Now that's goin' back to the wild I tell ya!

O.K., I'll step out of the single-wide and come back to civilization.

So John McCain's running mate likes to kill big animals and eat their meat. What's the big deal?

Here's my take. You've probably heard this one before from me, but it's worth repeating:

Once I was doing a bookstore promotion with a man named Duncan Renaldo. Who? O.K., reach back into the early fifties and very early television. Duncan Renaldo was the "Cisco Kid" and one of my early heroes. He was promoting a book - of poetry (a friend's). Even though he was much older (and much shorter) than I had imagined him, I loved hearing his stories about working for a TV studio and his early days in films.

"You know, I could have made more money, if I endorsed cap pistols with my name on them."
"Why didn't you?"
"Because every time you point a gun at someone, even a toy pistol, it means, 'I want to kill you!' I could never do that. Never."

That little old man's philosophy has stayed with me for thirty years.

Up until late last year, I lived in one of San Francisco's meanest ghettos. By the end of five years, sirens had no meaning and I could differentiate the sounds of an AK-47, a hand gun or an assault rifle - and tell how far away the shots were. I often wondered how a 16-year-old could get hold of weapons like that. Of course it was easier than I thought. Way too easy.

"Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Sure. But guns make it easier. Knives are messier, baseball bats are too conspicuous, and poison takes a certain amount of finesse. And every guy over 21 who owns a gun legally has a powerful lobby to help him keep it.

Now the NRA has a crusader in the front lines of a Presidential campaign. Odd, isn't it: a country that grows and breeds food for everyone and makes it available to everyone even in its far-flung corners feels it must protect the "sport" of killing. I used to fish with my father when I was a young kid. It was a "sport" because the fish had a chance to fight back and get away. Today's high-powered rifles with keens sights make a mockery out of the word "sport." The animals don't really have much of a chance. Neither do the people on the streets.

"But strict gun control would make it hard for people to obtain weapons to defend themselves as it says in the Second Amendment."

Tough. Do as Christ said and "turn the other cheek." Or stay out of places you know of where people have guns. Burglar? If you shot him, he'd only wind up suing you. If you killed him, you'd be in for manslaughter.

Now the NRA has a champion who shoots some of her meat - a champion to uphold their gun rights. Does anyone feel safer now?

Just a thought.

Of course, I like this kind of "gun show":

So shoot me.

Mrs. Mooseburger, Pt #2: What Will Happen If Sarah's Son Goes To Iraq?

Originally uploaded by keriwest

...And Finds Out They Don't Have Mooseburgers?

"I'm a mom, and my son is going to get deployed in September, and we better have a real clear plan for this war," she said. "And it better not have to do with oil and dependence on foreign energy."
Cheer up Sarah, it could be worse. He could be deployed to the Caspian Sea to protect Halliburton there:

Global Research - Jan. 10, 2008
In June 1999, in the immediate aftermath of the bombing of Yugoslavia, US forces seized 1,000 acres of farm land in southeast Kosovo at Uresevia, near the Macedonia border, and began the construction of a camp. Brown and Root, a subsidiary of Halliburton, currently provides all of the services to the camp. This same company receives $180 million per year to build military facilities in Hungary, Croatia, Bosnia, and several other countries. Presently, the Bondsteel template is being supported in Georgia and Azerbaijan. According to Chalmers Johnson, author of “America’s Empire of Bases,” the US has about 1000 bases around the world. “Once upon a time, you could trace the spread of imperialism by counting up colonies,” says Johnson. “America’s version of the colony is the military base.”

Kosovo is an American colony.

The main purpose for the Bondsteel military base is to provide security for the construction of the Albanian-Macedonian-Bulgarian oil pipeline (AMBO). The AMBO trans-Balkan pipeline will link up with the corridors between the Black Sea and the Caspian Sea basin, which holds close to 50 billion barrels of oil.
Sarah, Bush DID have a clear plan for this war: to secure oil. Politicians (those people you might have to deal with in Washington) have been up to their asses in oil for the last ten years. So has the military.

(But, ssshh, the public doesn't know that. Anyway, what they can't find on a map won't hurt them!)