Thursday, October 23, 2008

A Sign From Jesus About Gay Marriage? An Endorsement?!!

From the Washington Independent:

Just want to point out that fivethirtyeight’s polling chart for California’s Proposition 8 (to amend the state constitution to ban gay marriage) looks exactly like a Jesus fish.

Candidates to Look Out For: FRC's Voters Guide

Look Out For The Ones Who Oppose
Hate Crimes Legislation - They're Killers!

Tony Perkins has given us his list of imprimaturs: if these guys' policies are what he likes (or come reasonably close - hating enough of the right people, that is), then you can be sure that these guys will fill the halls of Congress with as much Christofascist-hatred-disguised-as-family-values bills as then Capitol and its dome will allow. To see the WHOLE thing click here.

Here are some highlights. 12 issues FRC wants you to think about when voting. The economy? No. The war in Iraq? No. Health care? No. See for yourself. The real meanings are in red.

1. Abortion. Does the candidate support or oppose taxpayer funding of abortions? Does the candidate support burning down Planned Parenthood clinics?

2. Partial-Birth Abortion. Does the candidate support or oppose the federal Partial-Birth Abortion ban? If the candidate supports the above, this question doesn't apply.

3. Stem Cell Research. Does the candidate support or oppose the federal funding of embryonic stem cell research? Ever see a stem cell up close? It has a soul, I tell ya!

4. Human Cloning. Would the candidate support or oppose federal legislation prohibiting human cloning? The candidate should oppose it, unless, of course, James Dobson can be cloned.

5. Eminent Domain. Does the candidate support or oppose federal legislation limiting the ability of government to take private land for other private development purposes? Hey, we're the ones who want to cover the earth with one big mall! Not the government!

6. Estate Tax. Does the candidate support or oppose repeal of the federal estate tax? If the candidate opposes it he's dead meat.

7. Traditional Marriage. Does the candidate support or oppose a marriage protection amendment to the U.S. Constitution that defines marriage as the union of one man and one woman? All fags should get "married" at Fred Phelps' Westboro Baptist Church!

8. Hate Crimes Legislation. Does the candidate support or oppose federal “hate crimes” legislation that would include “sexual orientation” among its protected classes? We can let our fag-hating preachers get yanked out of their pulpits!

9. ENDA. Does the candidate support or oppose the federal Employment Non-Discrimination Act? Don't let fags in on anything!

10. Energy. Does the candidate support or oppose lifting the federal moratorium on drilling for oil in the Outer Continental Shelf? God bless Sarah Palin! Drill, Baby, Drill!

11. Immigration. Does the candidate support or oppose any form of amnesty for illegal aliens? The candidate should suppose a bill for the most enormous fence (topped by broken glass and barbed wire, of course) the world has ever seen!

12. 2nd Amendment Rights. Would the candidate support or oppose a federal ban on assault weapons? Every American has a right to assault a deer, and elk, a moose, or even a duck in a sportsman-like fashion!

For the senate races, the ones Tony Perkins hopes you'll vote for:

Alabama: Jeff Sessions, Republican
Alaska: TED STEVENS?!! - on trial Republican
Colorado: Bob Schaffer, Republican
Georgia: Saxby Chambliss, Republican
Kentucky: Mitch McConnell, Republican
Louisiana: John Kennedy, Republican
Minnesota: Norm Coleman, Republican
Mississippi: Thad Cochran, Republican
Mississippi: Roger Wicker, Republican
New Hampshire: John Sununu, Republican
New Mexico: Steve Pierce, Republican
North Carolina: Elizabeth Dole, Republican
Oklahoma: John Inhofe, Republican
Oregon: Gordon Smith, Republican
Virginia: Jim Gilmore, Republican

Of the Representatives, here are the States to watch:

North Carolina
New Jersey

…Minnesota because the insipid Michele Bachmann is running. Elwyn Tinklenberg is running against her. I say, Tinkle for Tinkleberg – tinkle on Bachmann, that is!

Well, hope this slightly amended FRC voter guide has been helpful!