Sunday, October 12, 2008

God As Umpire: "Three Strikes, You're Out, McCain!"

If John McCain Could Have Clicked On This Website,
Things Might Be A Bit Different Now

Let's see: first Hagee, then Parsley, now Conrad. THREE crazy pastors! God is trying to tell John McCain something. And Palin's been nailed with One and a Half (the witch hunter was only a guest speaker). Why not have General Boykin sing your praises too? Poor Barack Obama must be jealous since he was only burdened with Jeremiah Wright.

The Iowa Independent reports that a minister who spoke at John McCain’s rally in Davenport, IA today injected a divisive statement into his invocation. Here’s what Pastor Arnold Conrad said:

I would also add, Lord, that your reputation is involved in all that happens between now and November, because there are millions of people around this world praying to their god*whether it’s Hindu, Buddha, Allah — that his opponent wins, for a variety of reasons. And Lord, I pray that you will guard your own reputation, because they’re going to think that their god is bigger than you, if that happens. So I pray that you will step forward and honor your own name with all that happens between now and election day.

Forget the obvious theological gaffs about "Hindu" "Buddha" and "Allah." If millions of people around the world are praying that Barack Obama wins, what does that say about John McCain? Could their prayers be telling us that they don't want the U.S. to have a president who is the same as the present one? Maybe they know something about McCain that we don't. Like it or not, some of those people have a good grasp of U.S. politics and politicians. They may also have the perspective that the U.S. is no longer a peacekeeping, diplomatic country. Eight years of history's greatest diplomatic dimwit has certainly taken its toll on our image.

If you go to Grace Evangelical Free Church of Davenport, IA, you'll see that Conrad's former church is challenged by grammar:

"Our missions is to help people become authentic followers of Jesus Christ."

Why are McCain's "pastors" so (I hate to say it) illiterate and theologically challenged? Hagee strenuously accounts why Israel needs to be whole again and says that God purposely caused the Holocaust. Rod Parsley uses military language in every sermon because he REALLY wants the U.S. to destroy Islam!! And McCain's latest, Pastor Conrad, needs courses in history and comparative religions. He also needs a course in religious tolerance.

Poor McCain. Poor God.

* The words in green are errors in grammar or logic:
"god" should be plural "gods"
"Hindu" is a religion, not a god
"Buddha" is not a god
"Allah" is really the same Abrahamic god of the Bible.
"their god" should be parallel - "gods"
"honor your own name" is theologically ridiculous - God does not have to honor anything. He's God.
Notice that Conrad never says that there are NO OTHER GODS. He makes it sound as if God is in competition with other people's gods.