Tuesday, March 11, 2008

If Moses Wasn't On Drugs, "Book of Revelation's" John Hagee Might Be!

Who else would take such glee from the thought of the Apocalypse?

What's with today's Apocalypticists? Ever notice how they talk about "The Rapture" with such... rapture? To them, Armaggedon's one hell of a show! Makes you question why Texas Chainsaw Massacre III wasn't a bigger hit. Their eyes seem to glaze over whenever someone sites all the gore and disease of Christianity's strangest book of scripture. They pratically applaud when the word plague is mentioned.

Of course, they reel with the notion that they'll be sitting in heaven while everyone else (who didn't listen to them) is being thoroughly roasted. In fact it seems that their idea of heaven is sitting comfortably among the clouds laughing at other people's eternal misery. "Oh, look at that adulterer writhing over there! What beautiful agony! God I love this section of heaven! Now I know what the Romans felt like! Thank God for guilty pleasures like this!"

Durer's Four Horsemen of the Acacia Tree!

And Christianists like Pastor John Hagee sincerely believe that the Book of Revelation will win out, giving them a great chance to say "I TOLD you so!"

Hae they been reading the same book as some of the early Christians? (from wikipedia):

In the 4th century, St. John Chrysostom and other bishops argued against including this book in the New Testament canon, chiefly because of the difficulties of interpreting it and the danger for abuse.


Nineteenth-century agnostic Robert G. Ingersoll branded Revelation "the insanest of all books". Thomas Jefferson omitted it entirely from the Bible he edited, and wrote that he "considered it as merely the ravings of a maniac, no more worthy nor capable of explanation than the incoherences of our own nightly dreams".

Professor of cognitive psyhology at Hebrew University, Benny Shannon created a firestorm of controversy last week when he theorized that Moses may have used hallucinatory drugs when he brought down the Ten Comandments from Mt Sinai.

"To back up his theory, Professor Shanon says the acacia tree, frequently mentioned in the Bible, contains one of the most psychedelic substances known to man." When you look up "acacia" and its phytochemistry you find that a whole lot of the 1300 species were used for "healing" and "recreation". In other words, "party time!"

And I'll bet that the Greek isle of Patmos (where Revelation was supposedly written) has some phatasmagorical acacias!