This Must Be The Home of “RAMBO JESUS”: Home School "Arsenal Sermon" On Newtown Hits New Low … For Christian Right Paranoia!

Just when we thought that the Newtown school shooting had finally brought out the worst in gun control rants and sermons, a pastor in Tennessee filled the heads of his congregation with thoughts that schools were government "mind-control centers" that taught "junk about evolution" and "how to be a homo.". The most egregious of the ideas, however, was that "home schools" were the safest because they did not have to have a police officer or metal detector and that " there's plenty of guns at my home school. Amen."

This Must Be The Home Of Rambo Jesus

In the annals of Newtown rants, Bryan Fischer turned up first and foremost by saying that "prayerless" schools were the cause of the massacre and that God did not protect the children because He was a "gentleman" who did not go where He was not wanted." It was a milder approach to the situation than the previous picture of Fischer's "Rambo Jesus" - the less than meek and mild firebrand who comes "with a sword", exhibiting a righteous cruelty.

Fischer's displacement of "meek and mild" with guns and ammo is not new, but with the backing of the NRA, far right elements of the Christian Right have made forays into the gun control war and have been more vocal in their support of paranoid sects like the Patriot movement.

Although the Rambo Jesus' Twitter account has been inactive for a year (and for what it's worth, a lampoon*), it is still evidence of a sub culture that believes more in the "come with a sword" words from Holy Scripture than "do good to those who defile you."

The Deepest Thoughts Of Religious Right ParanoiaLast Sunday, Pastor Morris (of Old Paths Baptist Church, Sparta, Tennessee) tried to evince the principles of his church:

"AN OLD-FASHIONED, UNAFFILIATED, UNREGISTERED, PRINCIPLED, HISTORIC BAPTIST CHURCH WHICH STILL HOLDS TO THE OLD-LINE FAITH OF THE WORD OF GOD AS OUR EARLY CHRISTIAN FOREFATHERS DID!"Unfortunately, the sermon was also unprincipled, uneducated and reeking of paranoia. His church's David Barton-esque take on the Second Amendment was lost in a sea of mind-controlling government and school education disconnects. Here are some points:

• Equal Rights: "It is a sham...As long as you're a prisoner, a murder, you can get equal rights"
• Adam Lance: "They need to string him up in public and set his body on fire."
• Gun control: Shootings only happened where guns are banned. (Ignoring the fact that the guns used in shootings are available where guns AREN'T banned). He also stated that there was "Never a mass gun shooting at a gun show"
• School security: "They talk about increasing security, but he shot through the security doors!"

He then posited five questions for the country:

• Why do you still send your kid to the governmental schools?
• Do you think that these shootings will continue?
• Does scoeity omehow share the blame?
• Who has the REAl authority over America's children?
• What is driving these mass shootings?

Morris' universal answer to these questions: Deception! - from the schools and the government: "...in 1963 the government and the schools kicked God out...and now they want Him back. ...It's too late"! He also stated that while practice and expression of religion was absolutely eradicated from schools, the schools are hell-bent on teaching humanism, that teaches your children that they are gods... teaches kids "to be homos" and that evolution teaches that you're an animal.

Bottom Line: "Pull 'Em Out!"

In Morris' plea to wrench children from the clutches of an evil, secular society controlled by the government, he uttered one one truism which, unfortunately, applied primarily to his own sermon: "lack of judgment brings on rage." Morris' rage of righteous arrogance rooted in ignorance and obscenely inept religious fervor transcended baffoonery and plunged into the depths of paranoia.


A dangerous paranoia the likes of which created Adam Lance.




*"It's important to love - if you don't, pray you don't meet @rambojesus.

Obama, Breitbart and Video Tapes

The thought of oh-so-sinister Obama putting a hit out on poor Andrew Breitbart has been too compelling for the conspiracy theorists. Now they have "revealing" tapes of Obama during his Harvard years to prove just how sinister and radical he really is. 


How will Obama react? With aplomb. Which will get the Right even angrier. 

The New Birth Missionary Kool Aid: Eddie Long's "Coronation" Creates A New Cult While Mocking Christianity And Judaism

He was wrapped in scrolls from the Torah - not in his usual spandex.


The media couldn't cope with the effrontery of it all, so perhaps that is why the latest news and video from New Birth Missionary Baptist Church didn't sally forth until last Wednesday:


Scandal-ridden "Bishop" Eddie Long was annointed "king" last Sunday in a ceremony in which he was wrapped in scrolls from the Torah and paraded around on a throne. He was also designated a "prophet of Atlanta."


This latest event from what has become the nation's most ridiculed mega church has astounded even the most jaded: the below video has gone viral and has had jaws dropping and WTFs peppering the internet. 


The entire video is an unbelievable act of hubris: as if we are seeing Napoleon crowned emperor by the Pope, only Long is a poor Napoleon and "Rabbi" Messer is certainly no pope.

The Presenter of Kings


"Rabbi" Ralph Messer and his SIMCHAT TORAH BEIT MIDRASH are confusing entities- vague amalgums of Christianity and Judaism tied to Long's past Economic Empowerment Summit, thought to be instrumental in Long's million-dollar ponzi scheme. Like Long's title of "Bishop" and Prophetess Cindy ("Japan is shaped like a dragon'") Jacobs' "doctorate", Messer's sobriquet of "Rabbi" seems to be fabricated.


But that doesn't stop the New Birth Congregation from swallowing every Scripture-referenced declaration by Messer. His charismatic, televangelist demeanor overwhelmed the audience. And his mini-Torah lesson sounded authoritative. After all, besides giving its history, he included the monetary value of the scroll, and  to a Prosperity Gospel congregation that is imperative.


"On behalf of the Jewish People, the land of Israel and the God of Israel, I want to make a presentation."


The next days and weeks will hear from the millions who disagree: Messer's authority comes only from Messer. The Knesset may have something to say about him. (Or nothing, since they may not know he even exists).


THE COVENANT AND THE KOOL AID


Most of Messer's annointing of Long consisted of making the scandal-ridden Long immune from any more ... scandal:


"He is a humble man."
 "You can't attack him!"
" He's sealed by every word!"
 "...hidden in the Word of God!"
 "He's given the Constitution of God as a KING!" 
"...is raised up from a commoner to a kingship!" 
"We love you Bishop!"


The ceremony seemed more of a covenant between Long and his congregation, a covenant that said that he could never again be questioned about anything, never again be doubted, never again be charged with any malpractice of faith or even any civil crime. From now on, "Bishop" Eddie Long is accountable only to God. 


The rest of the performance is merely a peon to rock star worship at concerts, with the star looking oh so very humble and tearful.

Perhaps Anthea Butler of Religion Dispatches put the coronation in its most revealing light:

Clearly they have drunk the “Kool Aid” and I don’t use that term lightly. I’ve believed since my trip to New Birth back in 2010, when Long promised to fight his civil case, that New Birth was a cult-like organization. Long’s hold over his congregation reminds me of Jim Jones. That may sound harsh, but Jim Jones slept with his members too, before leading the People’s Temple into the jungles of Guyana.

The mind-boggling loyalty of the New Birth congregation certainly seems to point in the direction of "cult."  Notable are Messer's references to slavery and chromosomes, as if to say that Long is anointed by New Birth's African American ancestors as well. 


Butler also believes that Long's ministry is dying and so is his mega-church. However, this slow death may make the congregants drink the Kool Aid all the sooner, and I, along with Anthea Butler, hope that more testimonies of sex abuse and ponzi schemes surface before it is too late.


What Price Gullibility?


Cynics like me tend to dismiss acts like the anointing of "Bishop" Eddie Long as the epitome of stupidity. But this time, I would like to say seriously that no matter how much comedy fodder Long and his minions might be, he's still dangerous - simply because he holds desperate, gullible people in his grasp. These people have been stripped of spiritual self-respect. We should laugh at him on the condition that laughter will cause his followers to take note and perhaps attempt to regain that self-respect - in seeking spiritual guidance elsewhere.