God's Ambulance Chasers Rush To Japan's Aid, But Lady Gaga May Have Gotten There First

Will Japan's skies start raining Bibles?
Or Will Lady Gaga's Prayer Bracelet Obtain More Relief?

There's definitely going to be a battle between Lady Gaga and Pat Robertson. 


WTF? Yes. While the Christian Right will be scurrying to set up electronic Bible Broadcasters as they did in Haiti, Lady Gaga's "prayer bracelet" may be more effective in helping the Japanese recover from the latest disaster. You see, hers is a true prayer for Japan because it comes with cash for food, clothing, medical supplies. The poor "pagan" Japanese (Buddhist, Shinto, Confucian), alas, cannot wear, eat or apply Bibles to wounds. 


I know that sounds quite spiritually callus, especially coming from a Christian, but it's true. With the exception of Operation Blessing (which has largely divorced itself from founder Pat Robertson ever since the mining equipment scandal*), faith-based agencies will be under a very watchful eye (including mine). The Asian Tsunami attracted Jerry Falwell (who, along with supplies, sent 600,000 Christian tracts to Hindus and Muslims), Hurricane Katrina attracted Pat Robertson ( who immediately poured 40,000 Bibles onto people  - dead or alive), and Haiti brought out a Christian group that deposited electronic "solar-powered Bibles" (at $90,000) to blare out Biblical passages as people fought off disease. Years ago, I called the whole mess of missionaries "God's Ambulance Chasers." Since then, the article still comes out on top for Google searches. In fact, it may be the only phrase this poor writer will ever be known for. 


Disasters. They really do bring out the best in people, in humanity. But rushing to evangelize after a tragedy can be akin to circling vultures. It's no secret that I'm against proselytizing, but inundating people who have been devastated by a cataclysm, a people who are of a different faith, with pleas to convert is ...wrong. 


And soothing words are cheap. 


The rush to insult another religion is also wrong, but righteous arrogance is strong: Falwell couldn't understand why people were appalled that he sent so many leaflets about the "Word of God" to suffering Hindus and Muslims. The people, thankfully, summoned enough dignity to to reject the paper cargo. Falwell was not amused. Robertson was also criticized for his rush to rain Bibles onto New Orleans, then he compounded the insult by his "contract with the Devil" remarks. To be fair, while supermarket tabloids are now trumpeting Robertson's impending senility, many people have thought him senile for the last thirty years, so his actions are considered almost meaningless. As God's ambulance chaser, he's been retired. 


So with Robertson retired and Falwell long gone, who will take up the gauntlet and become the next ambulance chaser of natural disasters? Lou Engle? Sorry. Lou Engle IS a natural disaster (just ask gays in Uganda). Rick Warren? I don't think so. Warren's too busy creating "Purpose Driven" countries (again, just ask Uganda). My bet is on Franklin Graham and his group, Samaritan's Purse. He may try to weasel in a proselytizing rally or two after humbly distributing food. Did I say humbly? Hmm. Well, maybe not too humbly. 


From its website:

Staff members are on their way to the affected area. We will be working with Japanese Christians to distribute food, water, blankets, hygiene supplies, and other aid to people who have lost virtually everything.

Samaritan’s Purse President Franklin Graham has conducted evangelistic Festivals in the Japanese cities of Osaka and Okinawa, and we have hundreds of church partners in the country.

On Samaritan's Purse efforts in Sudan:

Samaritan’s Purse has trained thousands of people from local churches to lead the reading groups. People who join the groups receive free Bibles. For many, it is the first they have ever owned. 

Yes, it may seem petty and anti-Christian to monitor such a group, but my premise lies hidden in the name of Graham's charity: the Good Samaritan of Christ's New Testament did not come back with a tract on Samaritan religion. The Good Samaritan, in fact, did not proselytize: he may have simply gone on his way doing good for others. Period.


All Hail Lady Gaga


No matter what I thought of him as an actor, Sean Penn captured my adoration in his valiant efforts in Haiti. Some movie stars are like that: combining their fame with the determination to get relief under way makes them more beautiful. And when a celebrity who has been endlessly pilloried by the Christian Right as being immoral performs a creative feat of fundraising for disaster relief, she becomes more than beautiful, she becomes ... stellar. 


The speed with which Lady Gaga came out with her "prayer bracelet" was amazing. The ingeniousness of the product was incredible: proving that spirituality can come in all forms and can transcend religion itself. 


Last year, the infamous Westboro Baptist Church (Fred We-Hate-Everything Phelps) put out a campaign, "God Hates Lady Gaga." And although being besieged by the Phelps clan has now become a badge of honor, Phelps' ubiquitous hatred mirrors the opinions of the Christian Right. Lady Gaga's response: 

“Do not interact with them, or try to fight. Do not respond to any of their provocation. Don’t waste your words or feelings, no matter what you hear or see… Be inspired to ignore their ignorant message, and feel gratitude in your heart that you are not burdened or addicted to hate, as they are.” 

Sounds as if Lady Gaga's words were straight out of the New Testament. 

If a heroic aura surrounds Lady Gaga at this time, it will be because of a simple humanitarian action. Many faith-based relief programs, however, have never taken the hint that actions can speak louder than Bibles.  

Below is an amazing video of the response of Operation Blessing. It is notable because it focuses ONLY on relief. Operation Blessing has learned its lesson.

*wikipedia:


After making emotional pleas in 1994 on The 700 Club for cash donations to Operation Blessing to support airlifts of refugees from Rwanda to Zaire, it was later discovered, by a reporter from The Virginian-Pilot, that Operation Blessing's planes were transporting diamond-mining equipment for the Robertson-owned African Development Corporation, a venture Robertson had established in cooperation with Zaire's dictator, Mobutu Sese Seko, whom Robertson had befriended earlier in 1993.

The Marquis de Sade Never Had It So Good: Phelps Is Making A Hell On Earth

Get Ready for Four Times The Hate... And Four Times The Pain!

The inmates of that asylum called Westboro Baptist Church have announced that since they have won the battle of  free speech, they will "quadruple" their assault on America and its evil ways. 


The irony about their methods of "love" in trying to save us from damnation is that they've created a hell on earth.

They are not alone, however. Far from it: there exist people and groups who are doing their best to make life hell for the rest of us. Whether we feel the lash of theocracy, are stretched on the rack by their corporate sponsors, or are placed in the embrace of the iron maiden of endless proselytizing, they will enjoy our pain and tell us that they are doing it because they "love" us. 

But perhaps the worst of all tortures is enduring their horrendously righteous arrogance, shutting off the rest of the world's philosophies from our existence, for no one is as virtuously good, as sublimely compassionate, yet as stupendously humble as they. 

In other words, in a hell on earth, the righteously arrogant will enjoy themselves immensely. 

The Marquis De Sade never had it so good.

The Senility Defense: Pat Robertson Goes To Trial In The Court Of Public Opinion.

When Christofascists start to bash their own, it's a truly wonderful sight: they turn away from hating everyone else and jockey for a slug at the worst of them just so they can look good in comparison. It's so deliciously rare that many of us ordinary people forget our struggles and stare in amazement ... and amusement. And when the MSM delves into past unpleasantness involving the said Christofascist, a pattern of vile un-compassionateChristofascists then turn on the person with lightning speed. While they do not devour him (although they want to), they make it known to everyone that such behavior is beneath them.

Now here's the official backpeddling from Robertson's PR team:

His comments were based on the widely-discussed 1791 slave rebellion led by Boukman Dutty at Bois Caiman, where the slaves allegedly made a pact with the devil in exchange for victory over the French. This famous history, combined with the horrible state of the country, has led countless scholars and religious figures over the centuries to believe the country is cursed.

Some of the highlighted words are buzz-words added to the context to make it seem as if Pat Robertson didn't just pick his vast knowledge on the subject out of a hat. Of course, when you view the entire footage of The 700 Club segment you realize that Robertson knows nothing about Haiti's history:

From wikipedia (under Boukman Dutty)

On 22 August 1791, Boukman presided in the role of houngan (priest) together with an African-born priestess and conducted a ceremony at the Bois Caïman and prophesied that the slaves Jean François, Biassou spiritual power of the forest and the ancestors, was sacrificed, an oath was taken, and , and Jeannot would be leaders of a slave revolt that would free the slaves of Saint-Domingue. A pig, which symbolized the wild, free, and untamableBoukman and the priestess exhorted the listeners to fight bravely against their oppressors. Days later the Haitian Revolution began.

Soon after the uprising began, French authorities captured Boukman and executed him by beheading. The French then publicly displayed Boukman's head in an attempt to dispel the aura of invincibility that Boukman had cultivated. However it remained strong, and their attempt failed.

And ever up-to-date wikipedia:

In the aftermath of the 2010 Haiti earthquake, the ceremony over which Boukman presided was called a "pact with the devil," responsible for a "curse" on the country, by Pat Robertson, host of The 700 Club on the Christian Broadcasting Network. Various prominent, mainline Christian voices have criticized Robertson's remarks on the Haiti crisis as untimely, insensitive, and not representative of Christian thought on the issue.

"It is absolute arrogance to try to interpret any of God's actions as a judgment against this person or that person. & Our duty as Christians is to try to help these people pray for these people and to help them."

- Dr. Robert Jeffress of the First Baptist Church of Dallas

"He must have misspoken."But we need to get on the path of helping people right now. God loves the people of Haiti. He hasn't turned his back on Haiti."

- Franklin Graham

These were, of course, shining examples of pots calling the kettle black. Suffice it to say, however, that Robertson's little anecdote was received by other professionals as being in poor taste. Some even think that he's possessed by Satan:

It appears that televangelist Pat Robertson is in the thrall of Satan, according to spiritual warriors, Drs. Valerie Tarico and Marlene Winell. “It’s the only possible explanation,” said Tarico. “How else can we make sense of his repeated attempts to humiliate both God and Christianity in the wake of recent natural disasters.”

[Dr. Winell] “Demons need a host, and they can jump from one person to another,” she explained. “We know this because Jesus cast demons out of a possessed man and into a herd of pigs. The pigs drowned themselves, the same kind of self-destructive behavior we are seeing in Mr. Robertson. It is possible that he was infected at or around the funeral of Dr. Jerry Falwell. In hindsight we can see that Dr. Falwell was possessed by a similar—possibly the same-- demon.”

- Huffington Post

And to give Rev./Dr./Broadcaster Robertson his due, there were some supporters:

"What the Robertson bashers left out is that finally, and with great compassion and concern in his voice, Pat said, "They need to have, and we need to pray for them, a great turning to God and out of this tragedy I am optimistic that some good thing may come, but right now we are helping the suffering people and the suffering is unimaginable."

- Gary Cass, Christian Anti-Defamation Commission

Does God hate Haiti? God hates sin, and will punish both individual sinners and nations ... The earthquake in Haiti, like every other earthly disaster, reminds us that creation groans under the weight of sin and the judgment of God ... In other words, the earthquake reminds us that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is the only real message of hope.

- Albert Mohler, the Southern Baptist Convention

Now several questions come into play: will Robertson himself issue some defense for his righteous intolerance and the denegration of an entire country? Probably not: his "apologies" for condemnation have, in the past, been choreographed rather sloppily giving the impression that he doesn't really care what people think.

Another question lies in the context of which his "philanthropy" is placed: is he really just a benevolent but senile old man? This is getting to be his milieu-du jour. He may not like it, but the public is becoming increasingly annoyed at his utterings and mutterings. When you mention his name, eyes roll and people get that What-the-hell-is-that-old-coot-up-to-now? look. "Did he leg press an elephant this time?" "Which town is going to get a fearsome meteor shower because someone hung a gay rainbow flag in front of their home?" "What did God tell him this time? Any good bets on the fifth at the racetrack?" And at the end of each instance, Robertson seems oblivious to the contempt at which he is held. Senility can create an alternate reality for some people.

In the past, Robertson has hidden behind God and His Bible to cover embarrassments. Will he hide behind Scripture ... or a diminished mental capacity? If he does either, he's a coward of the first order. The man is not senile. He is not frail. He is not a "religious fanatic." He shouldn't be hiding behind a dogma so righteous and rigid it would deflect the slings and arrows of the strongest detractors merely by being Holy Scripture. The man is guilty of arrogance, maliciousness and, most of all, stupidity. But not senility.

Pat Robertson listens to no one. The voices of Haiti's dead should be ringing in his ears right now because he has slandered them in a cavalier fashion and he will react to a catastrophe thinking himself to be The Good Samaritan. But his contempt for humanity shines through his veneer.

It always has.

It's amazing that people are just realizing it.

Below is a segment of The 700 Club in which Pat Robertson tells viewers that 40,000 college professors are "communists" some of them are "murderers". He thinks they "beat up" students while brainwashing them.