Q.: What Would The Holy Republic of Christianland Look Like? A: A Lot Like Texas.
Labels:
Christianland,
dimwits,
secession,
Texas
And it would certainly save the rest of us from the "We're-So-Persecuted" bunch.
And no more Glen Becks.
Instead, there would be absolute "from" freedoms: from religion, from proselytizing, from intolerance, from righteous arrogance, from bigotry, from misogyny, and from all the social phobias. And "to" freedoms: to marry and to say "Happy Holidays". Why, America could get to work at being a truly wonderful nation dedicated to love and peace.
Hey, we can dream, can't we?
The recent spate of petitions and buzz about secession can be clearly seen in this interactive geopolitical map. And it's not surprising as to where most of it is concentrated: Texas The state that has always had elephantiasis of the ego is the state that has toyed with the idea of secession for over a hundred years. It is the epitome of Barack Obama's "guns and Bibles" set, a place where Gary Cass ("You can't be a Christian and don't own a gun.") would feel more than safe and comfortable. It is a place that cheers it's record of executions. It is a place where megachurches and Fundamentalist theology rule, largely through a governor who calls together strictly Christian prayer rallies.
Ten days ago, opining on the differences of the electorate (Obama being demonspawn, of course), Bryan Fischer of the American Family Association suggested that a wall be built between socially conservative (Christian Right) America and the rest of country. He also suggested that people would be digging tunnels under the wall trying to get to "our" side, being, of course, more prosperous - and righteous.
Right.
What Would Christianland Look Like?
If Texas and its far Right minions seceded from the United States of America, it would, of course, be the dream of David Barton: it would be a "Christian ONLY Nation." The term "Christian" would have difficulty in definition and there would be in-fighting among people like Catholic bishops, John (Rome is the whore of Babylon") Hagee, and Cindy Jacobs (who goes around smashing statues of Catholic saints). Pat Robertson, who said that he didn't have to be nice to Methodists and Episcopalians ("spirit of the Anti-Christ") might have difficulty living amid non-charismatics, but once the unsavory elements of "True Christianity" have been rooted out, the country might have these demographics and pertinent data:
Ethnicity: 90% White, 8% African-American, 2% Hispanic (well, it does live right next to Mexico)
Christian Denomination: 60% Southern Baptist, 10% Assemblies of God, 10% Pentecostal, 5% Roman Catholic, 15% Non-denominational Bible-Thumper.
Population: 15 million plus the entire Dugger family.
State Bird: Raptor-hawk
State Motto: "In R.J. Rushdooney* We Trust"
Primary exports: oil, guns, Bibles, televangelists and righteous arrogance
Chief Institutions of Higher Learning: Regent University, Liberty University, Bob Jones University, Glen Beck University
Government:
President: Rick Perry Vice President: Mike Huckabee
Cabinet Members:
Secretary of State: George W. Bush
Secretary Of Defense: Erik Prince (of Blackwater infamy)
Secretary of Education and Home Schooling: David Barton
Secretary of Homeland Security: Chuck Norris
Secretary of Family Values: Tony Perkins
Secretary of Commerce: Mitt Romney (with special dispensation to his Mormonism by Dallas Pastor Robert Jeffress)
Secretary of Religious Affairs: co-Secretaries Cindy Japan-is-shaped-like-a-dragon Jacobs, and San Francisco Archbishop Salvatore Cordeleone
Secretary of Propaganda: Bryan Fischer
Secretary of the Interior: Michele Bachmann
Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff: Pat Robertson
Chief Justice of the Supreme Court: Antonin Scalia
Imagining what a meeting of government's top officers would look like damages the brain, but you have to admit it would make a great sitcom.**
Seriously. Seriously?
While we can poke fun at the machinations of the Christofascist Right, the matter of secession points out that they have made enough inroads in the country's Great Division to command some fear - if not respect. In a country that needs unification now more than ever, the big CR is not about to compromise and is best left alone - and far away - to lick its wounds from the election. Separation and isolation can be good things: the CR could be contained and politely asked ...
...to leave the rest of humanity alone.
Just a thought.
*Founder of the Reconstructionist movement and agent provocateur of American theocracy.
** A reality show would too surreal.
Posts
2 comments:
锘緿ue to the fact sheep fleece is utilised, all of the added benefits of wool are integral: insulating cozy in winter months permits oxygen blood movement in cozy climate safeguards your epidermis from chafing and softly facilitates the sensitive bones and muscular tissues belonging to the feet. Nowadays, I want to suggest you a pair of incredibly conventional for you. It is inexpensive UGG Women's Kailani! inexpensive UGG Women's Kailani is chiefly a new member additional to our beach front front thong assortment in our on the internet ugg outlet. Featuring a foam ease and comfort footbed, applying the a great deal simplest structure, placing on this cost-effective UGG Women's Kailani you will definitely really feel that you merely are stand about the beach. may well well be some one would have an individual a lot more feeling, along the lines of discovering a brand name title new town, or questioning about the road, and so on. Its lightweight model [url=http://www.uggsbootsuksalecheap.co.uk]cheap ugg boots[/url] and model is best for just about any sort of wears and steps in hot summer time.
The purpose is certainly easy and clear how the sensation of my ft is so superior, so at ease which could not be felt from other . So, what about you? are you at the moment a lave?of UGG Boots? Then, in the situation you say you certainly are a lave?of traditional UGG Boots, you should really know all of the exceptional capabilities of it and particular many pairs of UGG Boots. in the occasion you say you haven a lave?of UGG Boots however, then you definitely will need to know a ton details of it from this minute. There is so a whole lot information, alongside the lines of the track record of Australian UGG Boots, the groups of standard UGG Boots, and so on, about the online, or you can go toward the on the internet ugg outlet [url=http://www.uggsbootsukcheaper.co.uk]ugg boots uk[/url] to locate out one thing you have to have quickly. from the on the net ugg outlet, you not just can know all of the elements about UGG Boots, but in addition can [url=http://www.uggbootscheaperonline.co.uk]cheap ugg boots[/url] acquire a collection of incredible UGG Boots making use of the minimum highly-priced price tag tag about the marketplace. Just do it! to get the accurate lave?of UGG Boots similar to switch into a devoted lave?of trend. utilizing the time interval linked with winter season period normally requires place absolutely everyone be apprehensive about their exclusive pores and epidermis magnificence in add-on to comfort and ease and simplicity.
UGG leather-based mostly Tall Boots implementing the finest Australian Merino Sheepskin which can make it attractive are tall boots which you can cuff it budget friendly when you like to create you boots actually extraordinary. With two old fashioned buttons for the aspect belonging to the boot and also the fur, this UGG leather-based-primarily based Tall Boots seems genuinely noble on this wintertime evaluating other adult females uggs boots in your style ugg outlet. pondering about the most efficient raw methods utilized to make it andthe modern fashion and style it owns, Ladies UGG leather-based-primarily based Tall Boots is awesome and astounding one.Wearing Women of all ages UGG leather-based-centered Tall Boots make you be thought to be a wonderful and sophisticated princess. like a form of regular uggs boots, it owns all of the rewards of UGG Boots, which indicates you can invest in it relieved. do not invest the opportunity to get it for this chilly winter! UGG Boots nearly will get a legend in winter months that it is basically a sort of boots which could make your ft ultra cozy and secure beneath the coldest state of affairs or even the hottest climate.
The next time I read a blog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, I know it was my choice to read, but I actually thought youd have something interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you could fix if you werent too busy looking for attention.
[url=http://cheapjordans2013.totalh.net/]cheap air jordans[/url]
[url=http://jordansoutletgc.exteen.com/]jordan shoes[/url]
Post a Comment