Why I Am Allergic To Glenn Beck

“Only in America can you make that much money crying.”
(And From Having Vick's Vaporub applied under your eyes!)

Glenn Beck has spawned a new wave of pejoratives as well as bon mots. Some of them are worth repeating.

"High Priest of the paranoid style."

"Glenn Beck and reality do not mix well."

"Simply put: Glenn Beck is a modern day demagogue who spews lies and misinformation, fosters racism, hate and fear and whips all of this into a witches brew of anger that is divisive, destructive and pollutes healthy discourse and clouds the future of this country."

"If they’re giving Glenn Beck the key to the city, they should change the locks."

"...as inchoate and paranoid as that hawked by Father Coughlin during the Great Depression and George Wallace in the late 1960s."

Comparing Glenn Beck to Rachel Maddow is like comparing Bozo the Clown to Einstein.

Perfidiously obnoxious and superficial.

Truth-challenged.

Then there are those comments which are banal, but succinct:

Whiny douchebag.

Please keep in mind that some of the above comments were from own his home town!

Groups have demonstrated on the streets and in city council meetings over the conservative commentator's visit. Petitions have been collected calling on the cancellation of the visit. A small business owner put up a sign that says: "Glenn Beck & Hatred not welcome here." And the leader of a nearby city has offered the key to his city to Jon Stewart in sort of a mayoral rebuttal.

Of course, we all have our reasons for hating Glenn Beck and I have mine: I've come to the realization that I don't REALLY hate Glenn Beck. It's just that I've grown to be allergic to him.

This isn't silly, so please hear me out:

Hatred is man's dumbest, most unreasonable emotion. Hatred is without accomplishment. Hatred is useless. Hatred is totally against human survival.

Hatred is stupid.

And hatred is fostered by stupid people who want to gain control (or the gratuitous adulation) of other stupid people. Hatred through stupidity only begets ... more stupidity. And that's the point at which I get a rash... of hatred. And for that I am guilty and very stupid.

Just as I would go into anaphylactic shock if given penicillin, whenever I come in contact with Glenn Beck, I suffer an immediate reaction of hatred and, thence, stupidity. It's something I may have to live with the rest of my life. This, of course, drives a kind of stupidity phobia in me (yes, there is such a phobia). It's kind of circular when you think of it: Glenn Beck's stupidity/hatred makes me stupid/hate him. Does that make sense? We've experienced the opposite to be true: so many stupid Americans have a phobia against intelligence. They were the ones who voted for George W. Bush TWICE. And make no mistake about it: those same Americans have a fear of President Obama's intelligence.A President who is lampooned in the media as an idiot is preferable to a President who is mistrusted because his policies might be right.


So whenever I write disparagingly or condescendingly about Beck, I'm reacting to my allergy.*

I broke out in a rash of hatred when I read this, for instance:

In 2007, forest fires raged out of control in Southern California, "leaving one person dead, four firefighters wounded, and forcing about 1,500 people from their homes",(The New York Times). Here's what Glenn Beck had to say about the event:

"I think there is a handful of people who hate America. Unfortunately for them, a lot of them are losing their homes in a forest fire today."

Even Republicans are developing the rash: watch as Senator Lindsey Graham (R - SC) skewers Beck and right-wing media in general:


I never thought I'd compliment a Republican, but Lindsey Graham does seem to have a saner side than most.

I wonder what he thinks of teabaggers.


The latest on YouTube is Glenn Beck applying Vicks Vaporub under his eyes to make them tear. It was for a photo shoot. Now, only a true idiot would have allowed that video to be taken, much less published. Beck's too stupid to care about credibility. He'll now have to counter the video with genuine crying or he'll have to admit to deceit and laugh at the people who thought we was REALLY CRYING. It will be interesting to see how this plays out.

*This also applies to Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, Michael Savage, Fred Phelps, Tony Perkins, everyone who attended the Values Voter Summit, Sarah Palin, Lou Dobbs, Michelle Malkin, Michele Bachmann, Joe Wilson, Dick Cheney, Rick Warren and all Christofascists.