Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Christianist Cartoon Characters Aren't Very Funny

Remember: Fudd's The One With The Gun

I've told this one to friends many times before: at one time a fundamentalist fumed "Well, when you think of us, you just think we're either like Elmer Gantry or..or...Elmer Fudd!"

It's twoo, it's twoo, it's weewee weewee twoo.

But while we can make fun of Christianists (I like Andrew Sullivan's term much better than "fundamentalist" - it has a more sinister ring to it) we can't escape the fact that some of them (not all) might have a predeliction for violence.

The next quotes come from Top 100 Greatest Quotes from fundamentalist christian chat rooms. Granted, they might be suspiciously over the top, but after viewing other responses in Christian blogs, they read waaay too close to home.

[Following the comment "The evolutionists are only here to throw sh*t on the Christians... that is their sole purpose... ]

Exactly! The enemies of Christianity know that their pseudo science is bogus, fake, phony and fraudulent. They can fool some of the people some of the time, but they can't fool the vast majority of people. The only reedeming feature about these neo anti-Christians is that there are so few of them and, hence, easily annihilable. And the battle continues as it has for 2 thousands years.

[Reviewing "Letter to a Christian Nation"]

How much longer will I have to endure atheistic christophobia? Atheism is a religion, and let me cite some doctrines: ...
ATHEIST TENANT OF FAITH: The CRUSADES is an amazing example that I Love to cite in order to illustrate how wicked and vile Christianity is
REBUTTAL: The crusades were GOOD. If it weren't for the crusades the Muslim invaders would have conquered Europe and you'd be praying to Allah right now. Thank God (or the IPF for you atheists) the Crusaders pushed the Muslilm hoarde out of Europe and threw them back into the desert. Jihadian Mohammadans invaded Europe, and your damn straight Europe had a right to defend itself.

What's an "Atheist Tenant of Faith" ? Is Faith a landlord? What's a Muslilm hoarde? Is it a cache of Muslilms?. Jihadian Mohammadans invaded Europe. Yes, we can see the results of that horrible invasion in the ruins of mosques - from Italy all the way to Finland!

(on crying)

... while crying might not be a totally evil sin, crying offen does reflect a babies inner desire for itself. note that Jesus did not cry when he was born. Also, even if the baby is quite, you can see that sin is born with it. Sin can effect you in two ways, by it being done to you or you doing it. In the case of a new-born, by living in a sinful world, even the new borns suffer from sin. Not all new borns are born in perfect bliss? without disease...infact all are born...someday to die. the price of man's sin...sad isn't it... yes you might have seen me before...but God will always provide a witness. We will all stand together on this one.

I think he saw The Bad Seed too many times. If Jesus didn't cry when he was born, he must have had some other means of getting oxygen into his lungs.

And this bit of reasoning worthy of Aristotle:

Gravity: Doesn't exist. If items of mass had any impact of others, then mountains should have people orbiting them. Or the space shuttle in space should have the astronauts orbiting it. Of course, that's just the tip of the gravity myth. Think about it. Scientists want us to believe that the sun has a gravitation pull strong enough to keep a planet like neptune or pluto in orbit, but then it's not strong enough to keep the moon in orbit? Why is that? What I believe is going on here is this: These objects in space have yet to receive mans touch, and thus have no sin to weigh them down. This isn't the case for earth, where we see the impact of transfered sin to material objects. The more sin, the heavier something is.

Wow! I knew it! Calories are caused by the Devil!

This one is just plain scary:

Seriously, does anybody ever cry at an Atheist's funeral? I mean, since Atheists have no value whatsoever as human beings (they're not even human, but only inhuman animals), since Atheists are nothing but miserable Liars, Cowards and Murderers, after all, why would anybody in their right mind weep over the dead rotting corpse, or bone chips and ashes (that get mixed together with those of others from the crematory) of a worthless dead Atheist? And what epitaph do you engrave on an Atheist's grave marker? "Here lies the only good Atheist, which is a dead Atheist". What else is there say? Nothing at all. No last words, no last rites, no flowers, no anything.

Every time an Atheist dies, the world is better off as a result of that dead Atheist being dead, & its damned God-forsaken soul burning in the fiery pits of Hades. :) Which begs another related question, do Atheists cry at funerals? If so, why? Since Atheists hate God, and they hate Family, and they hate Country, who are they crying for? It is true: The only good Atheist is a dead Atheist.

And even scarier yet:

I can sum it all up in three words: Evolution is a lie!

Yes, we can all laugh with Bugs about how stupid Elmer Fudd is, but until he takes that gun (and that hatred) away from Fudd, someone's going to die.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Please come up with something more original then blaming all the problems of the world on conservatives! Also, you seem very unlikeable!