Saturday, June 2, 2007

Oh! The Horror of it All!

June 1, 2007

- by Dan Vojir

Once a week, I stare in shock as people struggle against a horrible monster: knowledge. You see, (to me at least) the scariest moments on television occur during Jay Leno’s segments called “Jay Walking”. These are on-the-street interviews questioning people with such profound queries as “Who is buried in Grant’s Tomb?” And although the most astonishingly stupid answers come forth, the most frightening aspect of the show is that these people are actually walking our supposedly civilized streets as average Americans. Actually, they may all be afflicted with gnosiophobia (fear of knowledge) so I shouldn’t be too harsh.

On the other hand, there’s the new Creation Museum: I’m not afraid of the huge animatronic dinosaurs cavorting with Adam and Eve, but I am scared to death that people actually believe they did. When I first saw videos of people at the grand opening making statements like “finally, a place where we can come to show our children what really happened in creation” I had the same sense of horror as when I see someone at the supermarket buying a copy of Weekly World News because, you see, they believe that the front page photo really IS Bigfoot’s baby!

Ninety-five percent of today’s evangelical Christians are Bible illiterates: they can’t tell you how the Bible was written much less relate who Athanasius* was. I’ll bet that very few people at the opening of the Museum could cite all Ten Commandments.

Imagine: 4000 people in one place who insist that the earth is only 6,000 years old, that the Grand Canyon was formed by Noah’s Flood and that Adam and Eve, along with Pebbles and Bam Bam rode on the back of Dino for fun. I’m getting chills just thinking about it.

An article by Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins crowed about a Gallup Poll stating that 31% of the Americans believe the Bible to be literally true – word for word. Fortunately, the poll also indicated that the higher the level of education, the smaller the percentage. Perkins forgot to mention that. Still, the level of ignorance in America is at an all time high.** Our schools no longer graduate future scientists or anthropologists; instead, they graduate biblical literalists who eschew history and politicians who promise to keep America Christian. And America stands proudly in its ignorance: the Creation Museum showed the world how reverently we treat such grandiose stupidity. Other less Christian countries are already talking about our new “Yabba Dabba” science. This means that in a few years, Ecuador may be ahead of us in medical breakthroughs.

Are you scared yet?

I am. I’m frightened beyond belief.

*Saint and Early Christian Church Father (d. 373) who dictated which books of the Bible were Scripture. He was also (allegedly) head of an ”ecclesiastical mafia” which violently enforced his ideologies.

**State senators in Texas and Georgia have actually tried to stop schools teaching that the earth rotates. They based their beliefs on one very “scientific” website:


Dan V said...


Christopher O'Brien said...

Hey, do I get to be the first? Great post...I hope you can find the time to keep them up on a regular basis (even once a week would be great) advice is to start slow and see how it goes...
Am certainly interested in your upcoming book...
In case the link doesn't work, my email is:
All the best,

Edward T. Babinski said...


Creation Museum's "Adam" owns adult website (The Cincinnati Enquirer reports):

"Registration records show that Eric Linden, who portrays Adam taking his first breath in a film at the newly opened Creation Museum, owns a graphic Web site called Bedroom Acrobat. He has been pictured there, smiling alongside a drag queen, in a T-shirt brandishing the site’s sexually suggestive logo."

See more Creation Museum critiques at

And this hilarious true story about John Mackay who was editor of the creationist magazine, then called Creation Ex Nihilo. In 1987, Mackay left the Creation Science Foundation, and started another creationist organization called Creation Research. Below is the weird story why he left!

"...a horrific attack (February, 1986) on our ministry (then called Creation Science Foundation) by Mr Mackay. The mechanism of attack involved a monstrous series of allegations without evidence—the basis was alleged ‘spiritual discernment’, involving ‘black cats’ and similar. These slanderous allegations concerned Margaret Buchanan, at the time a well-regarded Christian widow working for the ministry as Ken Ham’s personal secretary. John said she had been ‘specially sent by Satan’ to undermine him and the ministry, involved in covens, attending séances, etc.—never was there any eyewitness testimony or other evidence, merely ‘discernment’.

"When his attempt to sack her and take over the ministry failed, due to the Board’s refusal to violate biblical principle, Mr Mackay resigned. This was followed by a campaign of widespread innuendo and slander, involving actual fabrications which if accepted would tend to bolster his claim of ‘demonic infiltration’ of our ministry and thus would tend to undermine public confidence in our ministry. This included the bizarre and incredibly offensive claim that Margaret had claimed to have had intercourse with the corpse of her late husband (!)."

Edward T. Babinski

goprairie said...

oh, come on - that fixed earth site HAS to be a parody, right? i mean, they can't be serious, can they? it is scary scary scary that people beleive stuff like that.